Tom: Hi, I'm Tom.
Trix: And I'm Trix Googler! We're the famous parents of twins and quadruplets! Six kids! SIX!
Tom: This is our life.
Trix: And it's exhausting!
Tom: So there's been a change in our lives.
Trix: Tom is always saying how he likes me with blonde hair, so I got a makeover!
Tom: I didn't mean all stripey like that.
Trix: It's called highlights, honey.
Tom: We had a rough week. All of the quadruplets had stomach flu.
Trix: I was EXHAUSTED making organic soup for them.
Trix: Thank goodness our friend Patsy, who loves us, came over to do the laundry and watch the kids so I could get some quality time.
Producer: Can you explain how Tim ended up sleeping on the back porch?
Trix: He puked all over the new blankets in his crib, so I put him where he could easily be hosed off. The cool night air helped bring his fever down. Why are you looking at me like that?
Tom: After the kids were better, we decided they needed a special trip. We live really close to the Marks-A-Lot factory, where quality crayons, washable markers and paints are made. Marks-A-Lot - all the colours of the rainbow!
Trix: So we took the kids there to see how crayons are made.
Tom: And then we went to their activity centre. The kids loved it, and started playing as soon as they entered the room.
Trix: It was awful! The Marks-A-Lot people should have just entered them into a paintball tournament. Messy stuff EVERYWHERE!
Trix: Typically, NOBODY understood me. Don't they know that one mark on a piece of clothing equals one hour in the laundry room! I was really upset and my dumb husband was ENCOURAGING the children to use that messy stuff!
Tom: I just wanted our children to have fun.
Trix: They aren't allowed to have fun. Not my kids.
Tom: Trix got a little weird at Marks-A-Lot.
Trix: I merely suggested that everyone put down all those messy things and we could go home and have some really delicious organic fruit juice, from Juice-a-licious.
Tom: The kids preferred the paints and markers. Which everyone knows are washable.
Trix: "This is YOUR fault! No markers! No paints! No wire hangers!"
Tom: Tricia got upset because she wasn't allowed to use the paints.
Trix: She has low blood sugar.
Tom: "Trix, you have got to calm down. We won't get a FREE activity table with WASHABLE markers if you freak out like this!"
Trix: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH - did you say 'free'?"
Tom: "Yes, yes I did. And I promise that if the markers don't wash out, I will personally find a store to replace the clothes for free."
Trix: "Oh honey!"
Trix: Her first word!
Tom: The twins were upset about what happened at Marks-A-Lot. Tammy wouldn't speak to us for days.
Trix: So we enrolled them in a cooking class, where they could make all the mess they want.
Tammy: We really liked cooking class.
Tricia: We got to play with girls our own age, instead of the babies.
Tammy: We made muffins at home for Mommy & Daddy, but not the babies!
Tom: They were really yummy!
Trix: But not organic, so I threw mine out.
Tom: On our next show, the twins get music lessons!
Trix: And I get earplugs!